Final Fantasy 7: Mystery Case #2019215754384.ect
by Nakota
Summary: My first Mystery fic...please go easy on me *hides from evil people that are out there* AHHHHH!


Final Fantasy VII: Mystery Case #2019215754384.ect .etc .etc  
  
  
  
*Clouds house*  
  
Tifa: *Finished Cooking* WHO WANTS WAFFLES!  
  
Everyone: ^.^! *rushes to the table like madmen*  
  
*Lightning flashes outside*  
  
Yuffie: Cool special effects  
  
Tifa: How do you like the waffles  
  
Cid: They're a bit springy, what are they %^$ing made of?  
  
Tifa: Silicon  
  
Everyone: O.O!! *rushes to any sink or toilet around*  
  
Aeris: I knew it!, you have silicon boobies  
  
Tifa: Well actually they are scarl..  
  
*scarlet burst through door….drunk*  
  
Scarlet: Has anyone seen by boobie *trips* heh heh heh…I tripped  
  
Aeris: Oh  
  
*Vincent appears from no-where*  
  
Vincent: BOOOO!, I AM A BLOOD SUCKING WAREWOLF  
  
Cloud: I though you were a Vampire  
  
Vincent: *thinking for a few seconds* o------h yeah *vanishes*  
  
Barret: Damn foo' waffles  
  
Cait Sith: I'm luck I don't eat food, MWAH HA HA HA HA HA HA  
  
Everyone: O.o?  
  
*All of a sudden, the power cuts out*  
  
Aeris: *Jumps into cloud hands*  
  
Cloud: I'm gonna score with Aeris *hand slaps Cloud in the cheek* OW! Who did that  
  
Everyone else: Not us  
  
*Power comes back on, a man is lying dead on the floor with his guts ripped out*  
  
Vincent: Hmmm….it's too late, he's dead  
  
Barret: It looks like we have another mystery on our hands  
  
Red: Um Barret, we have never had a Mystery on our hands before  
  
Barret: True…..we have our FIRST mystery on our hands  
  
Everyone: *pulls dramatic poses*  
  
Vincent: Quick to the basement *runs into a wall, and collapses*  
  
Tifa: Vincent..the door is to your left  
  
Vincent: *Whimpering in pain* Th…ank…you  
  
-Basement  
  
*A low moaning noise can be heard from the bottom of the stairs*  
  
Cloud: EVIL! *Leaps into air and attempts to do some smart-ass moves…but trips and falls down the stairs* OW!, MY BUTTS NUMB  
  
Voice: Hee hee hee  
  
Aeris: Who's that  
  
*Lightning flashes through the small basement at the top of the wall*  
  
Red: Sephiroth?  
  
Sephy: Uh, yup, and sheesh those lightning special effects really suit the mood huh?  
  
Yuffie: *Looks out the window* Sure does  
  
CRACK  
  
Yuffie: MY EYE, THE LIGHTNING HIT ME IN THE EYES *collapses on the ground screaming in pain*  
  
Sephiroth: So whatcha doing?  
  
Vincent: Were trying to find out who killed the man in the lounge room  
  
Sephy: Who the guy that was killed?  
  
Vincent: Dunno, just some extra that was probably pissin off the director  
  
Aeris: THAT'S IT, THE DIRECTOR DID IT *pretending to stroke imaginary mustache* but why?  
  
Tifa: *evil glare* lets find out  
  
*directors room*  
  
*Tifa barges into the room scaring the living crap outta the director (me)*  
  
Nakota: What the hell *drops Ps2 control pad*  
  
Tifa: WHY DID YOU KILL THAT MAN!!  
  
Nakota: Cheese! *goes cross-eyed*  
  
Sephiroth: *sigh* this isn't going anywhere  
  
Barret: *humming the highwind tune while rocking back and forth*  
  
Red: Lets check the attic *BOM BOM BOMMMMM*  
  
Everyone: *looks around to try and see where that darn music came from*  
  
-Attic  
  
Cloud: Ooooooooooooooh *runs off into the boxes*  
  
Cait Sith: O.o?  
  
Vincent: Look  
  
*yet another man is lying on the floor dead, this time with his head chopped off*  
  
Yuffie: Yet another Kodak moment *takes out camera*  
  
*some strange sentence is incarved on the mans stomach*  
  
Those who seek the quest of life will get the stone of bath and get me a reli….AHHH GET OFF MY SCARLET!!!  
  
*loud music can be heard from behind some boxes*  
  
Yuffie: What's that noise  
  
*The group walk behind the boxes, to find cloud dancing only in Tifa's underwear and doing the bum dance*  
  
Aeris: O.O!!….well…….you don't see that everyday  
  
*Disco light appear from the roof as 20 Sephiroth closes join Cloud in doing the bum dance*  
  
Sephy Clone #24: EVERYBODY DANCE NOW, Bom bom bom bombombom  
  
Cloud: Join in  
  
Everyone: *Inches away from the disturbed Cloud and Seph Clones*  
  
*A figure float by the window, grabbing the attention of the gang….besides bum dancing cloud*  
  
Aeris: What was that?  
  
Tifa: Dunno, Quick TO THE ORBSERVITORY!  
  
Vincent: Um Tifa..we don't have a observatory  
  
Tifa: Sh*t….well then, TO THE BACKYARD, AWAY *jumps out of window*  
  
Everyone: O.o??  
  
-Backyard  
  
Sephiroth: Hey look a clue  
  
Tifa; it's a old coffin  
  
Yuffie: lets open it  
  
-------------------------------------------------------THE END-------------- --------------------------------------------  
  
Yuffie: WHAT, THAT DON'T MAKE NO SENCE  
  
Nakota: If people like this one…then I'll make part to  
  
Tifa: I wanna talk to you about something?  
  
Nakota: What?  
  
Tifa: There were some major flaws in that storyline  
  
1-First off, how did the dead guys get there, we never heard the doors open or nothing  
  
2-Where did the disco ball come from, we never installed them  
  
3-What was with the waffles…and that Coffin, seriously, this is one $&#$ing disturbingly wrong mystery/humor, oh yeah  
  
4-HOW THE HELL DOES THIS FIT INTO HUMOR, IT'S LAME…MYSTERY MAYBE…BUT HUMOR NOOOOOOOOO WAY!  
  
Nakota: *Sniff* All I wanted to do was write a funny story  
  
Tifa: WELL TOUGH!  
  
Nakota: *runs off crying*  
  
Everyone else: *Gives Tifa a really REALLY evil glare*  
  
  
  
Please review the part of the weird story, if a I get flamed, well….it serves me right for making this stupid fan fic *sniff* WHY DID TIFA HAVE TO TEASE ME  
  
*Rocks back and forth cuddling his legs mumbling something about the Angel Of Death, and grabbing a shotgun* 


End file.
